If you buy a bike named after a fish, will it rain every time you ride it? For some people, age is a hammock on a warm sunny day. For others, it’s a poison spider that drops down from the red oak tree. When you wear a Seattle Randonneurs jersey, don’t be surprised if people ask you whether you’re from Seattle. Why don’t they make a camera that shows how heavy your legs feel? Or how bad that dead raccoon smells? A headwind doesn’t blow, it sucks. If you build a trailer park, no matter where, they will come. Fishing looks like fun when you’re having fun on a bicycle. Despite assertions to the contrary, the convenience store clerk cannot guarantee that he just sold you a $20 million lottery ticket. What do you know – high water is bad for boats. The Dollar General store has pretty good prices on batteries. When you tell people how far you've ridden, the next question they'll ask is: Today? Pictures are the excuse. Legs are the reason. Proper hydration is not two water bottles in the first 100 miles and two in the last 30. Persistence and perseverance are signs on the wall.